Once a crush, always a crush.
I instantly feel colder now that it's november, oh... i also love the smell of fabric softener and am working on a marketing plan for some fabric softener cologne.
Once a crush, always a crush.
I instantly feel colder now that it's november, oh... i also love the smell of fabric softener and am working on a marketing plan for some fabric softener cologne.
We should probably take our clothes off so there is less confusion.
Bonus.
Always call off a date if you don't agree on how bacon should be cooked.
Insta-cred.
Incredible history today.
I'm prepared to be prepared.
Now that it's over my productivity can get back to work.
Pottercasm.
I have a sticker sticking phobia.
Learning to work smarter and harder.
My brain is like an external hard drive for hundreds of other people.
I used to prefer salty then sweet, but now i prefer sweet then salty.
Welcome to my private life, where i collect stickers and have a famous plastic squirrel.
Mini delights.
An example of this would be a mini donut.
There are three things i don't do on saturdays... set my alarm, clean, and break my habits.
What is the opposite of a pet peeve, because one of my big pet peeves is when words don't have antonyms.
Hello, my name is bugsy, and i love polka dots.
The first snow always brings out the romance in me.
That's probably the nerdiest sounding thing i've ever said.
I only open a can of crush when i know someone else has opened one for me.
Life's dynamic baby.
I'm amazed by the general consensus that pink starbursts are clearly the best.
Don't be stressed, it's highly overrated.
Guys of the world, we wouldn't know things like this typically, but did you know that it is impossible for girls to close their mouth while putting on mascara.
I need a new sharpie, a black one.
I've never had a friend named justin.
It is anything, everything, and nothing all at once.
It's not how well the car is in the snow, it's how well the person drives in the snow.
Basic happens.
Maybe for christmas youʻll get a box full of carpe diem.
Hmmm should i trade my one amazing candy bar for three 'eh candy bars and if you have one amazing candy bar, how many mediocre candy bars does it take for you to trade away the amazing candy bar.
If anyone is just, it's just me, since just is 66% of my first name.
I prefer writing letters that have straight lines.
White russians aren't really considered booze though, they're more like sex for your taste buds.
Looking for someone who brings out the fruit in me.
At the end of the day we all need to get stuff done, but not at the beginning.
I think i should attempt a blog that is entirely written in ridiculous analogies, and people commenting would have to guess what the analogy is for.
Gtd, gtd, gtd.
Christmas grouchin' it.
Random question rampage.
I am disgusted by people who buy pre-packaged store bought chex mix and offer it at a party, that is very offensive to me, if you buy that terrible chex mix keep it to yourself.
Trying to find the most basic desire in life.
I love spring, i lover summer, and i really love fall. but winter is different. winter is like a hot steamy love affair that comes for four months out of the year and leaves you again. it's love with passion. sometimes you hate it, but then it comes right back with some of the hottest, steamiest love you've ever known. and then spring comes and it's gone. winter is my love affair.
This is like eating brains.
I don't believe in absolutes.
I'm just a bad boy, that's why i go it alone.
There isn't anything that can't be quantified.
Inventing a chocolate chip dispenser for runners.
I like to eat things in threes, such as chocolate chips, three at a time, one on the left, one on the right, and one in the center of the mouth.
I think my brain crawled out of my ears while i was sleeping.
Quite possibly, i've done more personal ice cream eating research than anyone on earth, and there is no doubt that ice cream will cure most anything, and for those who can't have dairy, sherbet is a great substitution.
This sweater has great slimming effects.
Hey hot socks.
If i could listen to only one musician for the rest of my life, it would be miles davis.
Money is no incentive for me.
Pumpkin pie apple pie, pumpkin pie apple pie.
Not as envious as i expected, can go back to tuesday about that one.
Black friday is dumb.
Americans appear not willing to sacrifice a thing, on a day that after thanks giving (yes, that's with a space), and i don't know how many are truly thankful, not thankful enough to sacrifice much.
Malls are responsible for turning me into a christmas grouch.
Here's to you ernie.